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We're in the shitty timeline
It's not even the "dark" timeline, no We're not cool enough for the dark timeline of endless murderfucking skulls It’s all just brown Oceans of liquid, semi-solid fluid whereupon people float Like half-digested kernels of corn passing by the universe's digestive tract to its colon and out into this hellhole we call an 'Earth'
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Oh my actual fucking GOD the mendrawingwomen subreddit is bad for my blood pressure.
Especially due to their fucking cherrypicking and hypocrisy. FIRST of all, I'm approaching this shitshow from a gamer's perspective, because comicbooks were too much nerd shit even for me, who assembles PCB kits and fucks with computers for fun. To cut a long bruh moment slightly shorter, the Hawkeye Initiative was a tumblr (no I won't link directly, google exists - use it) where someone would post fanart of Marvel character Hawkeye in various sexualised poses... under the guise of "to draw attention to how deformed, hypersexualized, and unrealistically dressed women are drawn in comics" (ripped right from the tumblr). Yeah it totally why the author got horny seeing Hawkeye in these poses, no sir no totally not. It's an annoying double standard. People like watching attractive people do fun things. But I guess if it's a woman staring at a man's rock-hard abs it's A-OK and fine, but if a MAN dares to peek at a woman's breasticles then OH NO IT IS LE SEXISUMS. Fuck out of here. STRAIGHT out of here. Just say it. You're jealous of the pretty ladies. They annoy you that you don't look like that and you've never were anywhere close to looking remotely attractive - or you THINK you're not attractive because your mother didn't teach you to not ogle at overly retouched magazine covers... PLEASE admit it. PLEASE drop the shitty masquerade of anti-sexism and "empowerment" and shit. MAYBE if you admit that and drop the charade them MAYBE this species will move just a tiny bit forward as a society at large. They say "don't judge a book by its cover" but that's a shitty thing to say - and an even shittier segue to my next point - for actual books and comics where everyone judges them by their cover, which is directly used for marketing. The thing is that, women generally don't read comics or game as much as men do. And sex sells. There's no such thing as "untapped market" of women comicbook readers or gamers. And no, spending 69 seconds in the train to play a round of candy crush does not a gamer make you. Neither does my reading a comic book every five years make me a comic book reader. You don't need to be obsessing over a thing to be a fan of said thing, but you also need a certain degree of dedication and engagement with a thing to actually consider yourself a fan. inb4 any UHMMMMMMMMM WELL ACKSHUALLY - shut the fuck up. Whether we like it or not, it's a numbers game. More men buy comicbooks and video games, more men get invested in those media and the franchises sharted through aforementioned media, thus companies who want to market a thing, will have better chance of their marketing hooking in new consumers if they aim it towards those whomst are more likely to be affected by said marketing - i.e. men, in this case. Yes, it is unfortunate that there's not as much material directly marketed towards women, but it's a fact of life that women are going to like different things than men and there are more men invested in Nerd Culture(TM) than women. And life generally - and especially marketing in large scale - is a by-the-numbers game. before any THE NUMBERS MASON, WHERE ARE THEY - I have a few things to say: 1) my name's not Mason 2) it's a fucking opinion blog where I shart out what I've experienced throughout this travesty we call existence. moving the on Have you SEEN what things marketed towards women look like? Have you seen a cover of Cosmo-whateverthefuck? I've been down on my luck with no internet and a dead hard drive. I've whacked it to cosmo. I know other people who've whacked it to whatever the fuck fashion magazines... I mean have you SEEN women in suits?! BROTHER - wait I went off on a tangent again. Where in the absolute shit was I going with this? There's no escaping that a man will whack it to said material. But like have you SEEN things marketed to women? There's conventionally-attractive women there as well. Want a thing to sell to both men and women? Just get a model in a bikini to promote it but who's not very boobalicious. The main difference here is how each person views each piece of advertisement - and as they say, you can't spell "advertisement" without semen between tit, ergo, sex sells. And that last one is a universal statement. Because the more each assorted keyboard warrior is whinging at the fucking sky because a model is more attractive than them, there's a gorrilion more people with more self-esteem who see that model as someone to emulate by buying whatever thing said model is advertising. Basically, it boils down to this:
What pisses me off is that nobody seems to notice the split. Men are often portrayed around displays of wealth. A nice suit, an expensive suit. A nice, luxury car. In front of a gigantic house. Wearing Rolex watches. The only time I remember seeing big, ripped men is on bodybuilder-tier protein powders (the shit that comes in giant 5-kilo jars). Even workout equipment, when men are involved, is advertised by fit men... because most men don't want to be fucking Ronnie Coleman, they want to be fit. Besides. I don't WANT to consume media where the average /r/mendrawingwomen user's idea of "realistic" is prevalent. I want to watch attractive people do fun things. I don't want to watch a fatass struggle through life - regardless of how much rEaLiStiC it would be, because I play video games to ESCAPE reality even for a short while. I don't want my life represented in a video game - unless it's as an origin story and takes up maybe a minute of the introduction cutscene - because I know it'd be a shit game. I dare to even conceptualise the levels of self-absorbed egotism combined with non-existent self-esteem that I'd need to hold within my body to consider my pitiful existence at all exciting while also considering my flabby meatsack worthy of being plastered all over media while also wanting to strike out anything labeled as "conventionally attractive". I used to like diesel.
You know. Big truck make big noise and big torque. Then I get to drive a 2,5 litre '93 Mitshubishi Pajero and I absolutely hate everything about it. It's big, it's lumbering, you're making jack shit in terms of power until 2500 RPMs so if you want to do anything you have to bury your foot... yeah the turbo isn't making that much of a difference when it comes on anyway. The funny story about this is, it started its life as a 2.8-litre model, then the previous owner's son burnt the engine and the owner swapped in a 2.5-litre engine, that's when my father got it. And then he paid 5000€ to pull the entire drivetrain out because the dipshit who did the conversion fucked the adaptation between the old gearbox (which sat further back) to the newly-shorter engine. According to my father, one day he shifted and discovered he got five neutrals. Keep in mind, a turnkey Pajero back then, in perfect working order would've ran you about 5000€. Not saying that my father should've sold it for parts for like 1000€ and then buy another Pajero in better condition - but that's exactly what the hell I'm saying. I moved to Cyprus of studying and of course I needed a car since the public transport here is dogshit, walking is actually dangerous because every single sidewalk is unmarked parking space, using a bicycle - or a motorcycle for that matter - is out the fucking question because 99% of the drivers just don't give two shits about you and while I can walk for hours without much of a problem, everything is usually hours of walking away. I didn't really need a car in Greece because the coverage of buses and METRO is excellent in Athens. My father used to have it as his weekend-mobil. And obviously when I started driving it every day and putting more miles into it in four months than he's put in it in the span of four years... well, the thing started falling apart. The only good thing about this arrangement is that he's paying for it whenever it breaks the fuck down. First the ABS pump almost burnt itself off. A relay stuck closed and the thing was running non-stop. Then the brakes needed changing... of course I wasn't allowed to change them, regardless if I could find the brakes. Same with oil changes as well. I can't work on this pile of '90s junk. THEN the turbo starts wailing like a fucking banshee an scared me shitless... and the mechanic also said that the coolant system AND fuel system needed a rebuild. Like can you fucking IMAGINE? I managed to talk to the mechanic so he'd tell me the full extend of the damage and he showed me the bits he removed... it was BAD. Cooling lines to and from the radiator were cracked and looked ready to burst at any moment. Fuel lines almost clogged because for the longest time my father used the cheapest, shittiest diesel possible. The turbo was rattling - RATTLING! That shit costed my father upwards of 3000€ Basically the only thing I like about this fucking thing is that I can park it anywhere that it fits. The problem is that it really doesn't fit in all that many places. I've dinged the thing all around because I'm not used to driving such a long and wide car. I would've wanted my grandmother's '70s Morris 1100 but both my fucking parents are so against it that it's not even funny. Listen I get that there's a learning curve to driving a fully analog car. But my father is so worried I'll fuck it up, citing the dings on the Pajero as an excuse - without realising the fucking REASON I dinged the Pajero is because it's so absurdly big and I'm a new driver and the Morris is closer to the size of car I'm used to driving. This big, slow lumbering piece of shit would cost me something like 50€ to fill from almost-empty to full. Then diesel per litre shot up to almost 2€/litre. And when it was 50€ for half a tank... well it became 50€ for HALF a fucking tank. Diesel has climbed over the price of petrol. And this, well, is a problem. This pile is no VW Golf TDAYYYLMAO, no BMW/Mercedes inline-6 diesel, no - you get the fucking point. That thing is a thirsty '90s bitch. Consumption for this intercooled, 2.5-litre mess from the 90s is about 20L per 100km. Let that fucking sink in. And since I've gotten here, I've been asking my father for one thing and one fucking thing only: to get a Suzuki Vitara (I used to want a Samurai, but my fat ass just won't fit in one of these). And he just doesn't want to even hear it. I mean yeah, it'd only help me not pay out the ass for fuel... which a Vitara burns about 8L per 100km and STILL would allow me to straddle every single fucking sidewalk AND would be much easier to handle than like a 4-metre land boat of a fucking SUV. If I was driving a normal-sized car, I wouldn't have even scratched the thing. If I was driving a remotely normal-sized car I wouldn't be bleeding money on diesel for no good reason at ALL. But I suppose my father offloading his shitty weekend-mobil on me was the best course of action to piss me off just a little more, because of COURSE I can't really calm down too much in this shitty island. you ever just look at Americans and wonder why the fuck they whinge so much, regardless of how actually good they have it?
"UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE NOW!" the blue-haired one furiously slammed on the keyboard of their $5000 MacBook Pro. "ANYWAYS SO LIKE THE ORANGE MAN IS SO BAD AND TERRIBLE HE'S STILL BAD AND TERRIBLER THAN HITLER!" the purple-haired one screeched in their $2000 iPhone, comfortably sat in their $150000 Tesla model EKSDEE with all the options (including the automatic prostate massager). "ELONGATED MUSKRAT BUYING TWITBOOK IS THE WORSTEST ATTACK AGAINST LE FREEZEPEACH SINCE 1969 AND I'M LITERALLY SHAKING, PISSING, SHITTING AND NUTTING RIGHT NOW!!!!!!" the rainbow-haired one furiously slammed into their $2500 Samsung. Last night I was shitposting audibly in a Discord (I know, I know) and the following happened: one dude whom I know is American went about how he had to pay out of pocket to get in a hospital for his heart condition and so on. So naturally I'm just like "Wait YOU GOT TREATED and you have the nuts to complain?"... with the expected shitstorm of every fucking American in there went off on me about the "advantages" of "free" healthcare. I almost called some people the n-word - no I definitely called some people the n-word. First of all. I'm 100% willing to throw hands with any shitbird who just says "Europe" when they mean Germany and the Scandinavian countries. But we're not talking about those, no. We're talking about everywhere else. There's no such thing as fucking "free" healthcare. You only get "free" healthcare if you're insured - yes even in your European utopia. And what insurance is available? Shitty state-operated stuff. And you do pay for it - it automatically gets deducted from your pay and it's impossible not to pay for it. Unless, well, your employer doesn't insure you, which is illegal and very much is done regardless. And even if you are insured... woe fucking betide you if you need any kind of specialist care. You'll have to fight insurance - state insurance - every step of the way for a chance to get a different boomer to ignore your or your loved one's condition. I needed classes when I was insured for a brief spell, which meant I had to go through a FEW hoops. Getting checked by an ophthalmologist was the simple part... then I had to get the prescription into glasses. Long story short, I found a shop which had one last pair of Ray Ban frames for cheap (as in, cheapest in the store) so I bought both, right. Well fast forward to the insurance office with an idiotic boomer claiming I bought Ray Bans to show off. It took five months for them to reimburse me. Anyway. That's my personal story. My grandfather died in 2004 because they didn't take his heart condition seriously. A guy I knew from work had an entire shelf fall on his face (thankfully not full) and his ribcage became mostly bonemeal. He needed wires put through it to hold the bones together. The insurance wouldn't pay the several hundreds of thousands of Euros needed. His family tried crowdfunding and getting loans... but that'd take a good chunk of time. And while waiting, he got an infection and fucking died. Moving the MOTHERFUCK on. Americans annoy me to a visceral level. |